Don’t know why it took me so long to get a post out this morning. Just kind of feeling overwhelmed by all I have to do with getting ready, packing, handling more stomach issues. But I haven’t done a confession post in a while and I was just feeling it today.
Confession… since I am leaving Sunday morning I only went shopping once last Friday. That means my fridge is bare and my dinners have been kind of hilarious combinations. Roasted cabbage last night though did hit the spot. After Kaitlin’s post and realizing I seriously only have popcorn and egg left, I am debating whether to just buy a whole watermelon and dominate that tonight. #craving #sorryi’mnotsorry 
Confession… I finally did laundry after an over two week hiatus. No I don’t have that many clothes to not wear the same thing. Maybe, just maybe I re wore sweaty running shirts after letting them air dry. #gross #nodates
Confession... I saw PB2 as I was browsing Whole Foods. I didn’t buy it but I think I am going to make some more staple purchases when I return from California. I really don’t have any of those staples that can stick around in my cabinet which really is stupid now that I think about it. Yes, I may have to sell my arm with the amount of money I may chalk out but in the end I need some staples. Plus, I have never tried PB2. #newfoods #brokecitygirl
Confession… the apartment hunting isn’t getting easier. I have been playing with numbers already knowing I will have to spend more than I ever thought. That means looking at all my other expenses and seeing how I can manage those so I can afford a place. The worst part is, apartment buildings look at the money you have to assure that you will be able to pay. Wuh oh. Less spending in the next few weeks until I get a place that means #ihatesearching #findmeahome 
Confession… my sleeping is bonkers. See me tweet at 12 am? Read emails at 3 am? I haven’t been sleeping normal hours at all. I try to be in bed by 10, wake up usually around 1130, again at 2 am, maybe at 4 am, finally pulling myself to run at 545 am. Blows. I can’t wait to have a real bed and apartment. #dragging #airmattressproblems 
Confession… I have a lot of lofty goals for myself following my work trip to California. I will have three days of the apartment all to myself where I really am going to sit down and organize my random anxieties. I keep saying I will do this, do that but I haven’t. I still haven’t really cooked anything with my coconut flour, I still haven’t really made any great meals, I still haven’t found a way to increase my healthy fats or protein. Got to change. Luckily my motivation is high despite my wallet being low. I think California could be that propeller and break that I need to really dive into it. #holdingon #motivationfrenzy 
Confession… my training has been feeling great. I know I don’t talk about my training, basically because I don’t feel like I am ‘the best’ or ‘the most fit’ person out there, but I do try to train. Despite no strength training (I know this sucks!), I have been pumping out 50-60 mile weeks with 2x of Bikram. These have felt great which makes me one happy camper. I am starting to miss the upper body workouts but I just don’t have time or even self motivation to do it by myself. I miss the fitness classes a lot for this reason. #whatupperbodymuscles? #runstreak
Confession… my five days in California for work are probably going to be little to no exercise. I know, I know, I could get it in but being honest with myself, I don’t think I will be fueled properly to exercise like I normally do. Trips are my Achilles heel, they are rough on the eating front for me. I know when I went to Antigua with my family, exercise took the back seat. But in the end, my body liked that break and I came back feeling more psyched for my workouts. I usually take the few days I return from a trip to refuel and recharge. #honestyhurts 
Confession…I actually can’t wait to return from Cali because I have some great things to look forward to…1. lots of packages at my door, 2. my parents coming to help me apartment search, 3. hopefully a move, 4. Blogger meet up #wewillsee
Confession… I am getting more and more anxious to move. I feel uncomfortable here, lost here and not at home here. I love my friend, I do, but I don’t feel like this is my place or even comfortable doing those daily cooking adventures I so need to get into. I just feel like tip toeing around here and triggers are on the rise. #getmeouttahere #adviceplease 
Confession…my stomach has been worse. I don’t know if Cali will help or not help it. #stomachwoes 
Questions: What is a confession today? Do you take fitness hiatus when you know you won’t be able to fuel?
That’s some good miles you are putting in lady! I would definitely love to hear more about your running. That is very inspiring!!
Hope you have a wonderful weekend!
Thank you, I had no idea you were such a huge runner as well. I love hearing about all your running.
you should def go buy that watermelon, it will make your tummy better
. Taking a break from exercise may be good for u too, it is always hard at the time but once you get back into the workout mode you always think wow my body really needed that. I will just move to D.C. and be your roommate, we would have the best time ever! (I wish) Ps. I buy my PB2 on iherb.com, I am pretty sure it is less expensive then at the store, the dark chocolate is my jam!
Oh… thank you for that wonderful suggestion. I will check out that site. I know can you move here? Best roommates, we would have our own watermelon eating contest.
I love PB2- I bought mine on Amazon because my husband has a prime membership, so it shipped free in two days. I only put it in smoothies though, for actually eating peanut butter straight, I prefer the real thing. It definitely tastes good with chocolate protein powder after a workout (the shake tastes like a Reeses cup). Glad your running is going well too!
I kind of want to try it because I keep seeing it. Would be a good investment I think
Just try the 12 serving jar, it’s like $6 on Amazon, and if you like it you can get more. If not, it’s just $6, but it really is delicious in smoothies.
Hm, I will have to. I think it is even cheaper at whole foods.
I freaking love #hashtags. I have one in my post today, actually
Get the watermelon tonight. It’s summer.
Confession: I let sweaty shirts air dry too. #grossblogfriends
haha love the #grossblogfriends. hashtags are my favorite thing, I would hashtag in normal conversation if people didn’t hate me because of it.
Hope you find an apt soon!! Once you do, you’ll feel soooo much better I know! I think it’s good to take a fitness hiatus, and actually it will probably help. Whenever I am forced to take a week off I always come back so much stronger even though I get all anxious about it.
My confession: I showered 3 times yesterday. Morning, after the gym, and in the evening #toohot
with this heat you have to shower that much. I hope I do too, am feeling so defeated by this process.
So many “dittos” when I was reading this. I suck at laundry. My eats have been a smorgasbord of whatever is left. And seriously–I hope everything falls into place with the living situation!
My confession: if I could have froyo every night for dinner, I probably would. #donttellmom
Haha who wouldn’t eat froyo every night. I would in a heartbeat. Laundry is real world problems for sure.
I feel you with your sleeping problems,girl… I haven’t really slept the past few nights either and I feel so. terrible. I hope you feel better soon,though,also concerning your stomach pain.
sleep makes everything that much harder.
I just found your blog and I love it! Literally going through the exact same transition in my life right now, and my brain is just kind of a hot mess of checks I need to write to people, pre-employment forms to fill out, work (still working part-time at my undergrad job)…oh and I’m three weeks into an ED diagnosis…party time. I have struggled with anxiety and sleeping problems my whole life – especially living in LA, where the summer heat adds an extra layer of fun to my nights…my confession: at night, I sweat like a 40-year-old man.
I am so glad you found my blog! I will check yours out but feel free to email me! I love meeting new bloggers.
Great miles girl! Sorry about the sleep problems and that you’re having problems with healthy fats/proteins.
Have you tried nuts as snacks, or do you not like them? I can literally shove down pounds of them. If you ever need some advice on GF options for that stuff, feel free to contact me! I actually usually have problems finding carbs.. I’m all good on the healthy fats front. #addictedtonutbutter Whenever I can’t fuel myself properly, I am perfectly fine with taking a break! I know it’s better for my body and my mind. Sending you good vibes for apartment hunting!!
I think I just have never been a fan of nuts but some I like, like pistachios and sunflower seeds. I just need to buy them more to keep on hand. I wish I liked nut butter.
Since I am also #citybroke and do not have a gym membership, I do free workout videos on netflix. I look really stupid doing them but its free (well mostly) and I don’t have to go anywhere to do it.
I honestly think I want to invest in dvds. First I need my own place so my friend doesn’t think i’m insane.
Impressive mileage! Sorry about the apartment stress- that is no fun. Hope something perfect (and cheap!) miraculously turns up.
And the sleep thing is rough, too. That’s how my first year post baby went, whether she was up or not… I can’t function like that for long!
I think the sleeping part is really just making me want a place even more.
I’m so sorry your stomach hasn’t been feeling well! I know this is hard to do for someone who has a history with an ED but have you considered that maybe adding a couple of rest days to your week would help? Maybe it’s worth a shot to see how you feel! I know…easierTsaid than done.
Whenever I wake in the middle of the night and use my phone, it keeps me awake longer. Maybe try making a rule that you can’t touch the phone or comp if you wake up. If you have to do something, maybe read! That makes my eyes tired and can drift me back to sleep.
That #nodates hashtag rocks and I should be using it all the time b/c I tend to go places right from the gym and never have time to shower in between. I’m in class right now fermenting…I came from the gym.
I find that the more long cardio sessions I do, the more my upper body weight lifting suffers. Lately I’ve been doing more short cardio sessions paired with strength and have been liking it! But my workouts come in phases. Bikram is time consuming too – 90 min!
#NovelComment
Bikram is time consuming, I guess I lack motivation or even a plan to strength train on my own. I would love a trainer but alas money sucks. I think I need to have a no phone in bed rule, it is really bad. Like really bad. You are always so insightful and helpful Cait, I really appreciate all your advice.
You’re welcome Alex, I appreciate your posts because I can always relate to them so I hope my advice is helpful. Try going to bed with your phone away from the bed maybe!
Oh my goodness. I know what you mean about not having grocery shopped. I have been throwing together such random meals and relying on grocery store salad bar for a week. I leave next week though and don’t feel like shopping!
It is crazy the strange combinations I have been making but hey, saves money!
Confession? I may be 21, but I feel like the most childish person in the world lately, considering how much I am missing my mother. Almost 3 months since I have seen her. As for the fitness hiatus, yep. There were several times at school were I had applesauce to eat. That was it. Not quite enough to sustain a good work out!
OH GOSH I AM THE SAME WAY, I miss my mom so much and I am 22. I think it is all about realizing what will help your body. Just applesauce, not good missy!!!
Um, I’m basically the same when it comes to watermelon! I could dominate one and be okay with that for a meal but I’d probably have a giant stomachache afterwards which is why I try to be more self-controlled around it! I need to increase my protein too, I basically rely on peanut flour to get most of mine in but I’m planning on investing in some plant protein powder to switch things up. On the healthy fats thing, I’ve been doing really well with that since I started having Larabars more often, I’m addicted!
I need to try this peanut flour, you always have such great variety. I need some inspiration from you.
gahh love your mileage! 50-60mpw is my sweet spot, i hope i can get back there! I think Cali will be kind of a nice break for you too, despite all the anxiety that goes along with it – a break from apartment stress and all that, and I think you’re right, the change in environment will be a good place to re-wire and re-commit. and yes so much to look forward to once you get back!! DD iced coffee meetup!!
It is my sweet spot too, too much more than that and I am just burnt out. Can’t wait to get back and kind of jump into all of it.
hope your tummy doesn’t give you trouble. it needs to go away!! haha